


Hers

by theresnomeaning



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-11-30
Updated: 2015-11-30
Packaged: 2018-05-04 04:44:41
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,064
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5320934
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/theresnomeaning/pseuds/theresnomeaning
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>It took a long time, but he realized what they had, and whose he was.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Hers

The first time it happens it is almost accidental, a fire sparked suddenly, that gives no one time to run away. You are beginning to get used to deceive and ensnare, but she's been on this path for longer than you, and that makes you an easy prey. Not that you're an innocent lamb, obviously.

Of the Black sisters you are marrying the perfect one, but in reality you would rather marry Bellatrix. It's a pity that she's already married. And that she's crazy; even though she's powerful and from a good family, your parents would never let that woman be the mother of your heir. Everybody jokes that she's mad, but you know how much of he rumours are true—quite a lot.

But you are content, the few moments you spent together are enough because you can be what you really are. Your mother is happy closing her eyes to the path your leading—honestly, she despises mudbloods, so it must be easy for her. Your father likes to pretend that being a Death Eater is more politics than action. And Narcissa is more worried about marriage and social status. Everything is different with Bellatrix though. You talk about curses, dark potions and rituals that would provoke nausea in most people. You plan to torture muggles and discuss the most cruel ways to kill.

The sex is obviously something to mention, of course. You both have dominant personalities and it certainly makes things interesting in bedroom. Her beauty has a dark, dangerous side, and it acts like a magnet, always drawing you. You don't love her, and she most certainly does not love you, but this is not important.

.

When your son is born you forget a little about Bellatrix. It might sound funny that someone as corrupted as you could really be tamed by the birth of a child, but it does happen.

The first time you see Bella after Draco's birth she is wilder and more demanding than ever. Her eyes shine with danger, passion, desire and something else that has never been there before. Jealousy.

It's a shock, but understandable, and for some unknown reason you feel compelled to, well, not exactly comfort her, but to make it clear that she doesn't need to give you a child to be important. You kiss; touch and claim her body so she never forgets that.

.

The years pass, and every now and then your mind drifts to Azkaban, wondering, burning with curiosity to know how she is coping there. It is not exactly concern, but you would really want to know.

The most nasty side of your brain tells that you should not even bother, because you probably won't ever see her again; and even if you did, she would be broken and would be of no use to you. Surprisingly, this side of your brain does not win, and your mind continues on her. Sometimes you even dream about her, about how she would be in your arms again.

.

Yes, she's obviously madder than before. Crazy she has always been, but now she's also unstable. Cruelty is her name, and rage is written in her veins. While Azkaban obviously was not easy on Bellatrix, it also made her better somehow. She is not as beautiful as she used to be, but your attraction to her has not diminished a bit.

The first time you are together after her escape is even more spectacular than it used to be, because she is so thirsty for contact, for freedom, for _everything_ , and you are there to sate it. And it is only when you are buried deep inside her that you finally understand how much you missed this, how much you missed _her_. It's then that you realize how home feels.

Obvisouly you try to forget that, because you are Lucius Malfoy, not a bloody sentimental fool. Bellatrix would find it ridiculous too.

.

The night of Dumbledore's death is when you wonder for the first time how it would be different if Draco were Bellatrix's. He would have accomplished his task, no doubts. You wouldn't be here watching Snape get all the honours... Bellatrix stares at you with that mocking disapproval in her dark eyes, probably mirroring your own thoughts.

Narcissa flinches when Draco receives the _Cruciatus_ for the first time in his life. You try to comfort her just with your eyes, but it doesn't work. His screams pierce your brain. Later Bella seems to notice how much you need comfort this time. She does not give you that, no, and you never expected it, but she does have the ability to make you forget all of your problems for a few hours. You are grateful for that.

The sun is almost rising when you leave the bed you shared for the night. You spare a glance at her before closing the door of the bedroom. You feel something in your chest, a foreign sensation that you can't name.

.

The war goes on, and it is only when word that Bellatrix is dead reaches you that you remember that odd feeling you felt some months ago. That was the last time she was yours.

You lose the war. The Dark Lord is also dead. You flee with Narcissa and Draco. You are eventually caught and tossed in Azkaban. There are no dementors any more, but the cold and loneliness are awful anyway; so are the curses that the guards use on you. This time you will be staying in this place for the rest of life, you know this, and makes no attempt to stay sane.

One night when the moon is full and a slim thread of light enters your cell you can read it written on the wall. Her name.

Your chest feels warm, even if your body is cold as always. You touch the bars and rolls on the floor, trying to reconnect to something. You picture her in this cell, and can almost hear her screaming and laughing like the mad woman she was. You try to find something—maybe there's a lock of her hair here—and that's when you finally realize _it._ You don't really know if this is your last sane moment or the first step into insanity, but you realize that although she's been yours only on occasion, you have always been hers.


End file.
